Photo by Wesley Fryer
You’re watching the evening news and the anchor says, “Coming up next! Something that will scare the crap out of you!” After a sequence of commercials, back to the news program where they report on a murder, or an abduction, or just something that shocks and frightens you.
They peddle fear because it sells advertising. It gets you to pay attention.
We don’t become overly concerned about our safety in the real world, because we live in it every day — working, shopping, socializing, jogging &mdash and we know it’s safe based on our experiences. Horrible things on the news rarely ever show up in our lives.
The news widely reports, and harps on, those rare events that happen in the real world.
When they report about online dangers and examples of bad things happening on FaceBook, MySpace, chat rooms and the like, some parents become very nervous about their kids being in the online world.
Some parents, not having a lot of experience in the online world, aren’t living it every day and can’t grasp that it’s relatively safe. They are only going on the sensationalized news stories.
If you’re one of those parents who is concerned about the online world your kids inhabit, you need to take some steps so that you can relax.
First, get some facts to put things in perspective. I heard Lenore Skenazy on NPR’s Talk of the Nation to discuss the realities of online predators with Neil Conan, Richard Blumenthal, and Janis Wolak. Each has a unique perspective on, and it is worth the half-hour listen.
Lenore also wrote about the subject on her
Free Range Kids blog So check them both out.
Next, calm your nerves by familiarizing yourself with the online world. Even better, ask your kids to help setting you up. If they show you the ropes you’ll get a good idea of what they do online as they explain to you what is cool and what is dumb. Ask them questions like, “What if somebody friends me, but I don’t want to be their friend?” or “If somebody is my friend, and they start bugging me, can I unfriend them?” You may come away with a feeling that you’re kids are doing a good job of being safer online than you think.
But don’t be insulted or angry if they won’t friend you. This is a way that your kids hang out with their peers. You’re their parent, not their peer, and they will think it’s creepy that their parents insist on always being present in their teen hangout. Besides, don’t we want to keep adults out of our kids online hangouts?
Pick up Lenore’s, Free-Range Kids: Giving Our Children the Freedom We Had Without Going Nuts with Worry
{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }
Look online you’ll find a list of net perverts as well as on fbi lists….. And even some in the area you live in even. So be on the lookout write/save information you find on them. Let the kids know don’t talk to these people. Most net perverts who has been caught or not yet people’s done posted there accounts up etc on sites so others can beware. There are just way many sick people online now days. You gotta be careful. They accuse you of doing wrong sometimes. Sometimes not but they don’t do anything wrong. They do. And because of mental illness they find something….
I’m all for educating kids on how to be careful. But I think that the overall fear is so ratched up in today’s society, largely thanks to the media.
Recently, we received an alarming email from our school system, pointing out that in a nearby town, on a very cold, rainy, windy day, a kid walking home from school was offered a ride from some guy in a pickup truck.
The kid refused, reported it to his parents, the parents called the police and the police were out looking for the guy.
Is it more likely that this guy is a sex offender, or just a good Samaritan?
But look at the reaction of the kid, the parents, the police, and the school system. Alert: Likely Sexual Predator on the Loose!
There was no mention of the possibility that maybe the guy was just trying to help the kid by saving him a walk home in near freezing rain on a windy day. The message was a warning to parents and meant to strike fear, not promote reason.
I have a 13 year old daughter and last year i just happened to read an online conversation she had with a “person”claiming to be 18 ,red flags appeared all over it and as i read further alarm bells rang,the conversation from his side was so disturbing i called the police,turns out the person was a teacher of secondary school children.When i saw his made up online profile i would never of guessed it wasn’t real,so what chance did my daughter have,she just thought it was a good looking teenager paying her attention.It gave me and her a wake up call to the dangers and thankfully he was a first time offender who is now out of the education system and on the sex offenders register,but never underestimate the dangers on there we really need to get our kids to be open about who they are talking too so we can keep them safe.